What's In A Label?

     Haven't you noticed when you are meeting a new friend, he would always ask you, "what do you do?"  It seems a simple question but that makes you think hard because you want to impress him.  Sometimes you would reply with "well, I manage my own business."  When this new friend introduces you to his group  he says, "I want you to meet a new friend, he is a businessman."  You wanted to introduce yourself to your new friend as a manager but he decided to call you a businessman.  In that case, you earned two labels.

     Labels make a person important to everyone he meets.  It's like a title that is constantly clinging under his name and that really bears a price to most people.  You always know that there are people who will do everything just so they will not lose their positions in companies or well-known organizations because a label gives them prestige and honor.  In the company where one is a Chief Executive Officer, he can demand almost everything from his employees.  The label CEO means power and money and most employees like to reach this position because of the many benefits the label or title has.  The subordinates look at their bosses like gods that must be pleased all the time or else they lose their precious jobs.

   After office hours, a person has another label once he goes home.  He could be a father, son or uncle and each label has different functions depending on his duty that day.  However, he could also be all of those labels when other relatives are present in his house.  He could be a friend to others or a buyer when he goes shopping.  But really, what is in a label?  Do we really deserve all the labels that we have?  Are they just like titles that we want to attach to our names just so others will know that we make sense in this world?  Whatever your answer is, those labels are not really important because as you go on with your life you will definitely be stripped of those titles one by one.  Sometimes you would lose two in a row.  Now you are a husband and many years from now, wife may pass away and you lose a label.  There could be moments that your being father to your only son would be impossible once you lose him.  It is very natural that you will get lonely after losing a member of your family and also your label/title.  Until all of them are gone.

     When I closed my business many years ago, I could never think of a label that I could attach to my name or myself.  I thought it would be a real shame to have no label accompanying a person's name.  I was forced to hide in our house for a while until I finally resolved the issue.  Without a label, I was still the same person.  I could still make reasonable demands and go shopping like I used to do.  Only labels were gone not my whole being, not my whole self.  To this day, I still affirm this statement.

     Being the child of God, I am complete.  No label can make me above all else.  Labels can be used to lighten my loads, to be where I want to be and to get what I want.  But I can always have all the things I desire even if I do not have great labels.  The only way that could make me away from what I want is to be a negative person because being that way,  all I can attract are negative situations.  Even if I have many labels and continue to be negative, no good things will come to me.  However, you can enjoy the many labels you earn and to make them more meaningful, you have to do what is expected from those labels and you.  That way you always make sense.

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Have A Child-Like Attitude

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     The moment I see my nieces and nephews when they come to our house, there are attitudes I observe from them that I always remind myself to remain in me.  When I get to talk to them, I hear people who are dreamers, courageous, brave and always on the go.  When I see them tapping a computer keyboard, I see future web designers, computer wizards who are creative and talented that no companies will ever ignore.  They do not mind what other will say of them for as long as they show who they really are, such trait is something that successful people have.

     I just hope these attitudes of them will always remain in them as they associate with other people.  We were like them before but when we grew up we learned from others that we had to acquire other traits that adults should have.  We suppressed a number of emotions that seemed unforgivable in adults such as giggling in front of others especially when we talk about our dreams, showing too much care and admiration to others whenever we find them adorable and cute.  But these feelings help us get by with every day tormentors and stresses.  The reason why we have a hard time moving on and getting back with our senses is that we lose our child-like attitude when we reach adulthood.  Some dreams fade away and this make us don another costume or personality which fits the world we are at the present.  Just as I have observed a former classmate who used to be the class' clown but turned timid and shy guy now.  I just miss the laughter and fun he gave us before.  Now, he is like a robot which you have to pinch and press just so he can start talking.  Oh boy, that, I think, is not good after all.

     So why do we have to retain our child-like attitude which most adults think we should leave behind once we become grown-ups?
-  We retain our creativity which is important in doing whatever we want.  Imagine doing our projects without colors, words and pictures to make them comprehensible?  We can't do anything good if we just rely on the words that we only know, the colors that we have at the moment, the pictures that cannot describe fully what we are trying to say.  What we do represents our selves and it is only when we are creative can we do such wonderful creation.
-  We need to have the courage to go on and achieve our goals.  When we suppressed our feelings, it is difficult for us to run and work on our dreams because we are afraid that what we do or the way we do it will offend others.  We hate criticisms so we  always do what others like us to do and we end up mediocre because it is not what we want to do.
-  Every child is very curious in every little thing he holds or sees.  He is not afraid to ask questions, even stupid question for as long as the information satisfies his curiosity.  Most adults would never show his curiosity and ask mundane questions as this behavior is mistaken to be ignorant attitude.  This is the reason why some never really grow up.  They lack some knowledge that can help them advance in their careers.
-  A child is never afraid to show his real self.  He always does things that will only make him happy.  He is proud of what he has and likes to brag about them.  He is very imaginative and he even wants to explore on all the things that interest him.  He has a carefree attitude that always works to his advantage.
-  A child always wants to be happy.  His happiness is one reason why he is fearless to join contests, to talk to strangers, to visit new places, to try new things even if it will result to failure.  To him, every experience is important because he is always learning from it.

     These are some of the reasons why adults should not leave behind those seemingly foolish attitudes.  When we take them wherever we go, we are bound to create success in life.  We do not have to suppress those behaviors that will eventually lead to a more enjoyable journey.  Who we are is what we need to achieve our goals.  Who we are is perfect, complete and enough.  We do not have to change it nor hide it.  We only have to show it   When we do that, our life is truly enjoyable.

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Taming Your Inner Critic

    Have you ever noticed the time when you were about to do a project or a thing that you have doing, something would keep you from doing it?  Sometimes a problem would come up but most of the time you could never realize the reason behind that incident.  The truth is no external force was stopping you from doing what you want.  It is your inner critic that keeps you from being productive and creative as well.   I have observed this feeling and most of the time my inner critic wins which pushes me to procrastinate and feeling frustrated in the end.  When I purchased a book about writing which was authored by Tom Bird, I learned that our left brain is responsible for having this inner critic active during writing.  However, there is a part of our brain, which is the right brain, that can control and tame that inner critic.  The author suggested that a writer must set aside a time for writing and usually it is best to write after a good night sleep or an afternoon siesta because the left side of the brain is not yet active.  But what if you want to write in the middle of the day and you know that both sides of the brain are active?  Well, he revealed that one will always struggle to finish even just a page of what he writes.  Both sides are bombarding the writer with conflicting thoughts and it will always be like you are in a battle during this period. 

     Your inner critic can zap your energy and prevent you from doing the things that you like.  It will always

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block your creativity leaving you a copycat or a mediocre artist and you know where you are going when you become like one.  Your inner critic is capable of sabotaging your career and is always there even if you do not ask its opinion about the thing that you do.  If you are unable to silence or at least control your inner critic it will eventually leave you fearful and always hiding in your shell.  How will you be able to accomplish all your goals if you allow fear to reside in your being?  You can never be able to advance even a step toward your goal once your inner critic tells you that what you are about to do is useless and worthless.

     I have found a way to tame my inner critic.  Just before I do something  I do tapping.  I tap my meridian points whenever I feel that something is getting in the way of what I do.  This tapping technique is called Emotional Freedom Technique.  This makes use of your fingers to tap targeted points or areas of your body and at the same time reciting some lines or phrases.  If you inner critic keeps on chatting and you feel so confused you will step back and refrain from doing what you got to do.  Naturally, you feel upset and frustrated and the reason for being so is your meridian points or channels where energy is moving have been blocked.  Only by doing the tapping procedure can you release the energy that has been trapped in your meridian points.  You can search for it in Google and You Tube.  One notable personality in this field is Brad Yates.  He has a lot of videos about tapping techniques and it can be applied in almost all problems that you have.  I will write about EFT in my next article.

     For now, you know that there is a solution to taming your inner critic so it will never interfere with any of you desires.  Realize that it is always present and you can allow it to talk to you but only up to the point where you can still function well .

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The Way We Were

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     A few days ago I had the rare chance of bonding with my former neighbors whom I missed so much.  We had so much fun reminiscing our good old days when we used to play hide and seek in some deserted houses nearby.  I rudely interrupted the conversation as my eyes gazed upon the cellphone a friend was holding.  "Nice phone dude," I said to her.  "Oh, thanks.  It's not the one with the Apple logo but I like it a lot.  I can track down my friends' whereabouts.  You know, everyone is addicted to facebook."  We laughed at her comment but we noticed that she frowned, revealing deeper lines between her eyebrows.  "Hey. what's the matter?"  I asked her.  "Well. I saw this cute little boy outside their house holding the same phone I have now. Kinda strange because I remember, when I was at his age I wouldn't know how to use this gadget and yet..."  "You are so insecure!"  Another friend told her.

     That makes me wonder...Our childhood days were full of fun, laughter and kicks without those gadgets like cellphone, digital cameras, Kindles and the likes.  I could never imagine ourselves holding them without our parents' permission.  We were contented with simple, little things but gave us tremendous joy in our lives.  At least, during our younger days diabetes affecting children was unheard of because we were always outside our houses and we would always run and run until we run out of breaths.  Although we were always drinking chocolates every  morning, the sugar in our blood was always used to the max because the activities that we used to do required us to move a lot.  But now, I see children with big tummies and hands that could break any cellphone by just a minimal pressure.

     Another gadget that was missing then but really needed now is the computer or laptop.  I really like these stuff but the danger is that nowadays, very few children go out and play the way we used to do.  Children now spend too much time sitting in front of the computer and chat along with their friends in social networking sites.  There is nothing wrong with that but it makes them lazy to go out and stretch out.  Before they reach adulthood, they will be bothered by illnesses caused by adapting a couch potato lifestyle.  They no longer spend some energy to meet up with friends outside their homes and they just greet them through their pages sometimes with words only they can comprehend.

     Really, these new inventions have their pros and cons and people must be aware of them.  Some would never live without them.  It is good to have them really, but not to the point of making them the only the way to socialize and live a novel kind of life.  There is also life outside your homes.  Much more real and cheaper, most of the times.  Socializing with people face to face is still the best way to gain knowledge and also confidence.  Holding them in person makes them feel so real to you.  Their true motives are  not hidden, what you see is what you get.  You get to move a lot, laugh a lot and that means, you are burning your calories.

     Life is like that.  You gain a point but sometimes you lose two points at the same time.  Be wary of what you are doing now.  Your interests widen making you appear like an intelligent, well informed person.  But then, how is your health?  Your true worth? What really is important to you now?  Be your own judge as you travel to the next decade where the robots are said to take the place of some human assistants.
 

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Right Love: Must you Wait or Find It?

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     This morning I had the chance to view a morning show in a local channel hosted by today's hot singer/actress.  There were two guests, both singers by profession, who gamely answered whatever questions about love and relationship thrown to them.  One interesting question that caught my attention is about  soulmate/right one.  Find it or wait for it?  The guests gave different opinions and this made the discussion even more interesting.  People act according to their beliefs  and surely two groups will be born when the members are asked to choose which strategy they prefer most.  The strategies mentioned offer long discussion and one must dig deeper about the true meaning of one's action.  Different kind of people present different opinions even if all choose the find it option.  This is due to their lifestyle, background and educational attainment.  The more experienced they are with regards to relationships and love, the more rich the explanation they give.  So when you know of someone who opts to go the route that is different from yours, do not judge him/her.  You might be surprised to know that what he/she has in mind is an intelligent thought.

About Your Soulmate

     I am currently reading Kathryn Alice book entitled Love Will Find You.  I discovered a lot of great ways to attract the right love for each person.  The author believes in the existence of a soulmate and testifies that the man in her life now is her soulmate.  She has had her share of failures in relationships but never came out bitter because she understood that her past loves were never meant for her.  She had kissed several frogs before she ended up with her soulmate.  But then she never advises people looking for love to do the same-kiss several frogs.  From the way she presents the strategies in her book, it is safe to say that she is more on the wait for it side.  Well, there are some areas wherein one must act right away or short of saying one can find the right love too when you look for it.  But one sentence in the book that really made me enjoy my reading is that one does not have to go out to find your soulmate.  Even if one is just staying at home, your soulmate can literally knock on your door and profess his love for you.  That one is great considering that I work at home most of the time.  The author always mention in her book  that each one of us has his/her soulmate and that soulmate will never miss the one intended for him/her.  If this is the case, what is the best strategy:  Wait for it? Or find it?

Find It

     Remember that the Law of Attraction is always working whether you like it or not.  When you are giving the feeling that you need to find your soulmate, you are telling the Universe that you are alone and in need of someone to cheer you up.  The universe is like a mirror and whatever we give, we must receive.  So when you give that kind of feeling, the law of attraction must act right away and deliver to you the same situation - that you will always be needing someone to take care of you.  Find it strategy presents positive action when you act or do inspired action.  What do you mean by that?  When you clear your doubts that your someone special is hard to find and replace it with the feeling that she/she is already in your life, you become calm and at peace.  In this state of mind and relaxed feeling, inspiration will be sent to you.  However, most of the time you will not be led to the exact point at once but there will be people, events and things that will accompany you to reach that desired destination of yours.  But again, you must be able to discern the right inspiration for you to act right away otherwise, you lose your chance.

Wait For It

     Ms. Alice does not say that when you want to wait for your soulmate you will do nothing and just wait for him/her to show up in your life.  There are what she calls inner works to do.  What are these inner works?  One must remove blocks/negative programming/beliefs about the existence of his/her soulmate.  That one does not deserve true love because he/she is overweight, poor and jobless is a limiting belief or negative programming.  If you care to look around, you will get to know people who are sitting in a wheelchair for a long time but have somebody caring for them.  Not being blessed with good looks or not having millions in the bank never gets in the way of sharing a wonderful relationship with a soulmate according to Ms. Alice.  If one meets her/his soulmate this person will always be the best for that soulmate no matter what one has.Other inner works to do are releasing past loves that are still in one's mind and heart, doing a soul call where one recite a line like inviting a soulmate to come into one's life.  Buying a card for special occasion and writing a note in it, removing clutter in one's cabinet in preparation to sharing the space with special someone.  When one does these preparations he/she gives a feeling that a soulmate has arrived and is now in one's life.  The Universe then gives the same situation and you soulmate will be arriving and show up in your place.  When one acts as if her/his special someone is already in his/her life, the law of attraction will deliver the same to that person.

You are complete, whole and perfect

      Even if you are alone at the moment you are still complete, whole and perfect.  No one will complete you because you were born that way.  It is only your limiting belief that makes you feel incomplete without your special someone.  Even if you have had several failed relationships before,  you are still whole, complete and perfect.  When you always feel this way, things will improve  and you enjoy your life more.  When you are not acting desperately needing of somebody to love and just feel that you are loved, soon your soulmate will come along and add more zest into your life.

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Are You A Self-help Addict?

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     What type of books do you always search when you hit the bookstore?  Most people who visit the bookstore want to buy novels written by their favorite authors while few like something that deal with personal transformation.  Well, not really bad considering that more and more authors come up with something magical, transforming one to be the best person he is to be.  Like they say "when the student is ready, the teacher appears."   As one adds more years to his existence here on earth, he will always look for that thing that aids him in living a magical life.  Some people say that those statements contained in self-help books only meant to sugar-coat every plain explanation of those attention-seeking authors. They were written to fool those buyers and readers of self-help books , according to them.   There is nothing bad about being fanatic of that kind of book.  Maybe, those statements uttered by such people are just their personal opinions and they based them on those people who never really prosper even after reading tons and tons of self-help books.  Of course, one should not take that personally since each one of us is entitled to his own opinion.

     But then how does one know that he has become a sort of addicted to self-help books?  I bet, one is not really bad-looking like he has overgrown beard and nails, or his hair is way beyond his shoulders which he never washes.  But I have observed some behaviors of those people who become addicted to such type of book.  Here are some points I have discovered:

They always visit the bookstore every week to ask sales personnel about new released books on that category.  Nothing to worry about that except that these people can't seem to wait on the arrival of new books.  They always brag about this to their friends who find them really weird.  Most of the books that they have bought a few days ago are still wrapped in plastic and seems that they do not know when to open them.
They want to appear that something is lacking on them and they want to find the solution to it.  They know how to project themselves, they can explain well what they say and they look intelligent enough to weather those storms that they continue to meet.  But still, they are not contented and they want more.  Seems like they are being controlled by their emotions and minds.
They like to tell people about the thing that makes them busy, alert and smart.  Of course name dropping of famous authors makes one appear very smart and wise, almost like a sage and it impresses their friends and acquaintances.  How much more if they meet their favorite authors in person just by attending their high-priced seminars?  But the positive result may not be evident after all.

     So, what do you do  with those people?  Ignore?  Not the solution, I think.  Tell them to go up the mountain and live like a sage?  Hmmm...can they qualify?  The best thing to do is not to give bad feelings about their actions.  You see, they are perfect wherever they are, whatever frequency they have at the moment.  They are responsible for what is happening in their life and no one has the right to argue about what they do in life.  They just want to express who they are.  Even if their actions and behaviors are irritating to you, do not give negative reaction or else it will be you who needs to read that kind of book.  Now what to do with how you feel at the moment, considering that you always want to read that kind of book but never really have the precious time to do so?  The moment they tell you about their experiences about reading this book makes you think twice about your capabilities, your real self, your wants, your goals.  Now, you seem to be addicted too.  You have this unexplainable itch to go to the bookstore and find something that will make you whole even though you do not have the precious time to do so.  You get stressed and started to blame other people.  Is it really right for you to react that way?  If you think that way, go ahead but do not be clueless about the reason why you attract negative situations in your life.  Like those self-help gurus tell us, do not give negative feelings on those situations that you do not like.  Negative emotions attract negative situations.  So how do you deal with being a self- help addict?

You are enough.   Yes, you can remind yourself that you are enough, at least for now...Remember that you were created after the image of God, that means you are perfect, complete and whole.  But then as you were busy collecting your friends as you grew up, you also embraced their signature statements that seemed to be damaging to you but still, you refused to recognized that way.  You lost your way.  You became  strange, unhappy and alien to your real self.  And this being addicted to self-help books is your way to get back to your original form and self.  Not really bad.  Be sure when to call a time out to it. Be sure to get acquainted with genuine people who can help you find your true path.
Do what you are told to do.  When reading self-help books, your being enlightened comes only when you do those exercises outlined in the book.  Nothing good will ever happen to you when after reading the book, you just sit around and wait for something big to happen.  Progress will be seen after the experiment.
Live a good life by doing good.  Self-help books teach you several ways to live the good life and you can attain that by doing something worthwhile.  This kind of books not only teach you how to get rich but also, how to be wealthy.  Which means all areas of your life are taken into consideration.  When you have meaningful goals, you want to wake each morning full of energy to work on them.  The right path is getting clearer to you.

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Are You Chasing Abundance?

     The word abundance confuses many people.  When people are asked about abundance they always think of one thing - MONEY!.  Abundance incorporates a lot of things and it is simply means "ample quantity," "profusion," and so on.  It incorporates everything that makes a human being satisfied and happy.  Relationship, career, other interests may speak of abundance and if all the areas in your life are shouting the word abundance, that means you belong to few good men who know how to attract abundance.

     Most people are still struggling in life even though they have worked so hard for a long time.  The abundant life that they have been dreaming seems nowhere to be found.  They have spent considerable time and effort to chase this kind of life only to find out that the kind of energy that they are giving is the wrong one.  What wrong energy?  As sages and gurus are telling us, everything is about energy.  Our thoughts and feeling have energy and they vibrate and reach the Universe.  The Universe is like a mirror, we always receive what we give.  Chasing abundance reveals there is lack, need and want in one's life and this is the kind of energy that one is giving to the Universe.  In return, the Universe sends situations similar to what one is sending, so he receives in that form that tells of lack, need and want.  Great author Napoleon Hill writes in his book, Think and Grow Rich, that money is shy and timid.  The moment you chase money, it will run away from you.  On the other hand, poverty is bold and ruthless and when you think of it, situations similar to what you are thinking and feeling starts to appear in your life.  This is what the author wants us to learn.   Since then, more and more books are written based on what Hill had conveyed.  What could be the reason why people adhere to this kind of notion and feeling-wrong energy?  Let us see some points to ponder:

     Self-Limiting Beliefs
     Do you have limiting beliefs that keep you from attaining a successful life?  This beliefs were given to you by your parents, friends, relatives, acquaintances which you adapted and tried to live on.  What are these phrases that seemed to stop you from getting what you want in life?
     "You have to work hard to get the money."
      "Money does not grow on trees"
      "My family is poor so I will remain this way"
      "I have big dreams and I don't think I deserve them"
      "Wish I were in another place so I could earn more"
     Do you really deserve to have this kind of life?  If you believe so, you can have it.  So what is the best thing to do to eradicate all these beliefs.  Simply release them from your system.  There are a lot of techniques which you can use to let go of these beliefs.  You can try Sedona Method, Emotional Freedom Technique(EFT) and a lot more.  Search on the web and you will discover which one fits you.  But I really recommend these two techniques because they ask only a few minutes of your time everytime you do it and you are on your way to getting what you deserve.

     Not knowing what you want, who you are
     Do you really know what you want?  Are your dreams yours or from those people around you?  Most people who are experiencing difficulties in life really do not know what they want, they just go with the flow or what you call the "in thing."  They disregard their true feelings and try to live someone else's life by living the dreams dictated by those people around them.  When you reach a certain age and you feel that you have to voice out your opinion, do so.  Rather than live a miserable life, affirm your wants and live  the life that is truly yours.  How do you do this?  Know who you are.  I recommend that you go on meditation 15 minutes a day to get in touch with your inner self.  The path that is really meant for you will be revealed.  Point out your values, the things that matter to you and work on your goals.  You have to have a mission in life to really live a meaningful life.  You were born to do something and this is what you have to find out.

     When you have thought about the above explanations, you would know that by having the same kind of energy you attract what you want.  When we desire good life, we just have to feel what good life is.  When we want abundance, think and feel abundance.  This way you are giving out the same energy.  The energy of abundance is positive so when you feel good, abundance is on its way to you.  Same with money, when you feel good about money, you send out positive feelings to the Universe.  Like attracts like.  The Universe sends you situations that will give you money.  Sounds simple but true.  It is all about feelings and thoughts.  Stop chasing abundance.  Feel it.  But first, eliminate your limiting beliefs and know who you are and what you want.

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